It never seems to end...

A glimpse into life of an owner operator. As usual, I keep it transparent for those who find value in our little saga of a small family run company that is just trying to provide for their family and follow their passion and love for this gamble called trucking.

Well...We've reached an impasse.

My heart is super heavy today after Daryl called me last night with news that no owner operator wants to receive.

Transmission failure.

Under load.

Tractor without power.

At least he was safe-ish on the side of the road.

Que fight or flight response.

Driver safe, check.

Load safe, check.

Truck operable, nope.

I don't know if it was divine intervention or what in all of this but Obsidian shut down in Dallas, enroute to Houston to deliver this crane equipment back to the equipment yard, 38 miles from the house and 6 miles from the Kenworth dealership.

A quick google search for a semi wrecker popped up a highly rated company who was thankfully available within the hour and was the cheapest tow in town (if you call $630 for 6 miles cheap...man we are in the wrong business!!). I was falling apart on the inside and trying to keep my composure on the outside as I'm getting the ball in motion of getting the tow lined up, calling the KW shop in preparation for our arrival, communicating with the broker and trying to keep myself and Daryl emotionally in check with this huge hit we are experiencing.

All that keeps replaying in my head is the conversation with the broker yesterday about why we can't haul cheap because of potential breakdowns that each load brings. Just on replay in my head.

A little humor in all this is that in all of the chaos last night, all I could think about was getting my husband home safe, I was prepped and ready to run out the door to go get him, all while apparently not remembering that I have an infant sleeping soundly in the bed  Thankfully, Pops was here and able to drive over to Dallas to pick him up. I don't know what I'd do without that man. He knows all too well the stress we are feeling, having lived it. And I can't imagine how difficult it is as a father to watch his daughter experience such big stresses. I just love that man, and am so blessed to have him.

Thankfully the broker is remaining cool with us as I keep her in the loop of the play by play of what's going down.

I'm grasping at straws with this one, as an owner operator this is what we hope and pray never happens. This is why I fight like a bulldog for the highest amount in a rate so we can plan and prepare....Unfortunately in this market, like so many others, a maintenance fund is almost impossible to have. It just is what it is. I feel like I'm watching a sinking ship in the moment and all I can do is pray. Pray that this doesn't force us to give up all we've worked so incredibly hard for over the last 2 years. Pray that our warranty covers this issues. Pray the broker continues to work with us knowing we are doing everything in our power to fulfill our obligation to this load. I'm praying...I'm praying these prayers are heard.

I write this not to generate any type of sympathy or any type of reaction. I write this to hopefully have something to come back to years from now and look back on, hopefully still in the game and remember the time this beast called trucking almost got my goat. I write this because frankly, I need to get it out there.

This is the reality of trucking. This is what we signed up for. Would I change our decision to jump in? Absolutely not. I have the deepest love for our little company, for all of our hard work. For all the memories we've made, I wouldn't change it for the world. But my heart is heavy, y'all.